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I
am helping my friend Sherrie out with her wedding this month.
We’re both in our early 40’s and have never been married -
probably, in part, due to focusing so much on our careers. We also
never gave in to societal pressures to get married earlier from
family and well-meaning friends - although we both got close to that
altar at some point in our lives. Each
of us is also with our soul mates now, and I’ll be planning my own
wedding soon. This
got me to thinking about the changes over the years of what my ideal
wedding would be. Every
little girl dreams of the perfect white wedding with the
“poof-y” dress and long white veil, something along the lines of
Princess Di’s splendor or Julie Andrew’s long train and veil as
she wed Capt. Von Trapp in “The Sound of Music.” I was no
different. The groom was a detail I would “fill-in” later, but,
yes, everything else would be set for the perfect big white wedding! And
then Elvis changed all that. I saw “Blue Hawaii” and wanted to
be Joan Black, standing beside Elvis on that canoe platform, wearing
a holoku as we sang the “Hawaiian Wedding Song” to each other.
Friends and family would gather on either side of the river echoing
in perfect harmony. It would be so romantic and colorful. Yes,
that would be how I was to marry! By
the time college rolled around, I had a lot of family and friends’
weddings on my calendar. I was even a bridesmaid a couple of times
and asked to wear some pretty hideous dresses that would never see
the light of day again. I
was dating quite a bit, but marriage was the furthest thing from my
mind. And yet, I still thought about my wedding day. I decided to
ignore tradition and do things my own way, not follow any wedding
etiquette from a book. Who says you have to wear white? And forget
that white-tiered monstrosity of a cake - bring on the chocolate
fudge! And the reception would be one big dance party. Yes, my
wedding would be unique and fun! Years
and wedding ideas came and went, and now, here I am in my 40’s
actually ready for the real thing. And where am I now? Well, if we
had a wedding here and invited family, friends, and business
associates, we’d be looking at a minimum of 800 people - 500 if we
really pared that list down. That wedding would cost a small
fortune, not to mention be a source of headaches and stress. I
love my man. Our marriage is way more important than the wed-ding
itself. We’re
going to Vegas and finding Elvis to do the deed. At least Elvis is
back in the plans. |
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